If I ever see you I will blow smoke in your face and act like I don’t know you and I will get in my car and I will drive away and if you stand in my way I will stomp on the gas pedal like you stomped on my heart.
And if you don’t move the fuck out my way then (maybe) I’ll talk to you and by that I mean I will scream every shitty thing about you at you and by that I mean I hope I don’t spontaneously burst into tears if I were to ever see you.
I wanted my mother to tell me that sometimes we love the wrong people, but it’s okay because we live and we learn and we grow and sometimes the person who seems wrong for us is actually pretty right for us because somehow it works.
But she mercilessly told me the truth. You were no good for me and I should have known. Why are the best lessons learned always learned the hard way?
I would rather inhale smoke than filly my lungs with your atmosphere ever again.
If I could, I would blow smoke in your face and sting your inferior eyes, but I don’t even want to see you.
Life becomes easier when you make peace with the hurt. I no longer smoke to replace the hurt you caused with another hurt. You matter less the more time goes on and the more I experience life.
On Valentine’s Day this year I told myself I was writing off boys because my friends and I were obnoxiously cat-called. My heartbreak taught me not to settle.
Yet the next day I fucked a boy I had just met and I felt completely free of you. Funny how he made me feel more comfortable in the few hours that I knew him than you ever did in the years that I knew you.”
Everything I Let in to Let You Out (via flowersfromdirt-)
I just wish I knew what to do. So many options given to me, all with very different road paths… I just wish I knew the outcome of every one so I could make my decision from there.
But unfortunately life isn’t that easy and it never will be.
“I want your stupid fucking sense of humour making me laugh at 4am when I have to be up at 6.”
“Do not fall in love with people like me.
I will take you to
museums, and parks, and monuments,
and kiss you in every beautiful
place, so that you can
never go back to them
without tasting me
like blood in your mouth.
I will destroy you in the most
beautiful way possible.
And when I leave
you will finally understand,
why storms are named after people.”